Everyday Ubuntu: Living Better Together, The African Way by Mungi Ngomane.

4/5 rating. 226 pages.

Book #89 of 2020. Read December 29, 2020.

There are certain times that you read a book and it just absolutely resonates with you: this book just about sums up my worldview and I absolutely loved it!!

“Ubuntu is about reaching out to our fellow men and women, through whom we might just find the comfort, contentment and sense of belonging we crave. Ubuntu tells us that individuals are nothing without other human beings.”

I think one of the worst parts about the American ethic of rugged individualism is that we miss so much of the impact that every interaction has on us. We don’t have control over such a large portion of our lives: we don’t choose our parents, we don’t choose our upbringing, we don’t choose where we are born. We are each the lucky (or, unfortunately, not so lucky) inheritors of our plot in life. This does not mean that we have no impact on how our life shakes out, but it does mean that we need to realize how lucky we are, and how important the people around us are!

This is why the idea of Ubuntu is so important, we can only improve humanity’s lot in this life if we all work together.

This book was full of beautiful, and poignant quotes. Here are just a few:

“If you want to go quickly, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” – African Proverb

“May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.” – Nelson Mandela

“The question therefore is, what are you going to do in order to enable the community around you, and enable it to improve? These are important things in life. And if you can do that, you have done something very important.” – Nelson Mandela

Quotes:

“Maybe that is all we can hope for – that one generation will make sure the next knows how we are meant to live as human beings, caring for one another and respecting each other’s humanity.”

“The lesson of ubuntu is best described in a proverb that is found in almost every African language, whose translation is, ‘A person is a person through other persons.’ The fundamental meaning of the proverb is that everything we learn and experience in the world is through our relationships with other people. We are therefore called to examine our actions and thoughts, not just for what they will achieve for us, but for how they impact on others with whom we are in contact.”

“One with ubuntu is careful to walk in the world as one who recognizes the infinite worth of everyone with whom he or she comes into contact. So it is not simply a way of behaving, it is indeed a way of being!”

“If we are able to see ourselves in other people, our experience in the world will inevitably be a richer, kinder, more connected one. If we look at others and see ourselves reflected back, we inevitably treat people better.”

“Ubuntu tells us we are only who we are thanks to other people. Of course we have our parents to credit for bringing us into the world, but beyond this there are hundreds – if not thousands – of relationships, big and small, along the way, which teach us something about life and how to live it well.”

“However, in the West we are also taught that it’s a badge of honor to claim to be self-made. We applaud those whom we perceive as having achieved fame and fortune through their own efforts, happy to overlook the fact that nothing can be achieved in a vacuum. We are further taught that competition leads to self-fulfillment and progress, even though pitting yourself against others leads to unhelpful comparisons and a grinding sense of not being enough.”

“Ubuntu refutes the notion that a person can ever be self-made, because we are all interconnected. We should not be fooled by the myth of the self-made individual, as no one exists in true isolation.”

“I am only because you are.“

“The world is full of individuals who all want the same thing: a fair and just society, an opportunity to live in peace with good health, a chance to provide for their families, and to feel safe and prosperous.”

“”Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” – Ian Maclaren, Scottish theologian

“It is only in allowing ourselves to take a 360-degree view of any given situation that we are actually able to make just and compassionate decisions and actions.”

“The organizers told Betty to hurry too, but she smiled and politely declined. She told them clearly and calmly that there was always time.”

“Step outside yourself and see the good.”

“I believe each one of us is a saint until the contrary is proven.” – Archbishop Desmond Tutu

“People are human beings, produced by the society in which they live. You encourage people by seeing the good in them.” – Nelson Mandela

“Every day, everywhere, a million small (and sometimes big!) acts of love, devotion, selflessness and unity are carried out, which encapsulate and celebrate our humanity.”

“When you choose to see the good in others, you end up finding the good in yourself.”

“It takes strength and determination to see the good in someone we don’t know, or someone we suspect might not have our best interests at heart. Forcing ourselves to look for the good in someone takes real character.”

“We must accept finite disappointment but not lose infinite hope.” – Martin Luther King Jr.

“Remember that hope is a powerful weapon even when all else is lost.”

“Making an effort to nurture our human inclination to hope is a powerful way to help achieve our ambitions in life.”

“Despair was a choice. Hatred was a choice. Anger was a choice. I still had choices and that knowledge rocked me . . . I could choose to give up or to hang on. Hope was a choice. Faith was a choice. And more than anything love was a choice.”

“It is human nature to feel disconnected from life at times. Feelings of isolation, apathy or loneliness can sometimes overwhelm us. Especially when we’re stressed, tired or anxious. Instead of hiding away, ubuntu tells us we should reach out to humanity during these testing periods and allow ourselves to be comforted by it. And there are many ways of doing this.”

“‘Education is the most powerful weapon you can use to change the world,’ said Mandela.”

“Ubuntu tells us that in order to feel human we need to feel connected. A sense of togetherness is necessary to find contentment and satisfaction in everyday life.”

“Who forgives wins.” – African proverb

“When we forgive, we do so not for the sake of the person who has harmed us, but for our own sake.”

“Remaining humble and looking at what others can offer means we can learn from one another, because we see each other as equal beings.”

“If we have room and people need a place, then they have a place.”

“To love deeply will involve grief. To stand for a cause, as my grandparents did, will involve sacrifice. To hear constructive criticism can lead to learning. To allow yourself to be vulnerable can ignite compassion and deepen your relationships with those around you.”

“There is a universal respect and even admiration for those who are humble and simple by nature, and who have absolute confidence in all human beings irrespective of their social status.” – Nelson Mandela

“To live authentically we need to be honest with ourselves and others. We need to face our problems head on, and help find solutions with our fellow women and men. In turn, this allows families, communities and societies to move forward together.”

“If you think you’re too small to make a difference, you haven’t spent the night with a mosquito.” – African proverb

“‘We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean,’ [Mother Teresa] said. ‘But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.’”

“Serving others, ubuntu tells us, is never wasted time.”

“Ubuntu is about gently putting other people’s needs first. Without fanfare or expecting anything in return, we see other people before we see ourselves – or as ourselves – so we treat them the same. Giving away more than we take, putting someone ahead of us.”

“Everyone can tell the difference between being listened to and being heard. We cannot make progress if we refuse to listen to people we don’t necessarily agree with. Ubuntu invites us to listen to others as we would like to be heard.”

“Believe in the good of everyone. If you look for the good in someone you will find it, and inspire and encourage others to feel good about themselves.”

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